Iβve been living in Melbourne for one month. I love it, but I have to admit Iβm surprised by much more difficult it is moving to a new city, compared to travelling through many cities. I thought moving would be easier than a month of multi-city travelling, but itβs actually much harder.
On paper, it should be simpler: one permanent address, unpacking just the once, the same street, the same markets, the same bed.
In reality, moving to a new city for the first time has been one of the strangest experiences of my life.
One day, Iβm blown away by the new experiences at my fingertips and the next, Iβm dreaming about buying plane tickets for my next trip to anywhere else. I donβt feel at home, but I donβt feel like Iβm far away. Why canβt I wait to explore somewhere new, when Iβve barely scratched the surface on the incredible city Iβve just moved to?
Moving to a new city makes you work harder for your rewards. You have to be patient. Itβs a totally new experience for me, which is why itβs so important.
The instant gratification of travel
Itβs easy to get addicted to the instant gratification of travel. You stay for a couple of days, maybe a week or two, and you live every day like itβs your last.
You eat interesting local food, every morning at the local markets is a thrill and your days are spent seeing the best, most interesting, strangest, most beautiful parts of a city. Sure, there are hiccups along the way, but after your short stay you leave satisfied. Your whirlwind adventure threw you into the best bits, and pulled you away before the ugly parts β or worse, the boring, everyday parts.
On to your next destination, to rinse and repeat. You come home, high on travel and full of energy. You canβt wait to book your next ticket out of town.
Slow & steady rewards of moving
When you move to a new city for the first time, itβs easy to expect the same things. Logically, you know youβre moving to work, eat home cooked food, sleep and live a βnormalβ life, but in your heart of hearts you secretly expect the same cherry-picked adventures that you had abroad.
At first, it seems this way. Youβre ecstatic that you live within walking distance to the cityβs best farmers markets. You get lost in new laneways every lunchtime. You quickly suss out the local bar scene and earmark your new favourite haunts. You mark your diary with the exciting events coming to town.
And then it is quiet.
The quiet part, I wasnβt expecting so soon. This is when moving becomes more difficult than travelling. Weeks become a series of sky-highs and everyday lows.
Itβs the best parts of short term travel and also the worstβ¦on repeat, for months.
This feels uncomfortable. Is this good or bad? Fun or scary? Smart or stupid? Am I happy or terrified? Why am I finding settling in so difficult?
Because moving is a marathon, not a sprint. And I am not a marathon runner. (Actually β Iβm not much of a runner at all, but if I was going to run it would be a sprint).
When I travel, I can move on to the next exciting place and bliss out on the sensory overload of every new city. Iβm addicted to the differences. The strangeness. The weirdness. The newness. Itβs the same in all aspects of my life. I love to dive into things, get completely lost in things, and then zoom into my next adventure or passion project.
I was SO excited to move to Melbourne. So many new neighbourhoods! And laneways! And bars and restaurants!
The thrill is starting to wear off. As it should. This is my new home, and itβs starting to feel that way. Iβve never called anywhere but Brisbane home, so itβs odd to start having these feelings for some place else.
Itβs kind of like when youβre on a boat, and your eyes see a steady horizon but your body feels the boat moving, and you get seasick. Everything around me looks familiar now, but my life is so different now that itβs making my head spin.
When it’s totally worth it.
Itβs worth it when I walk across Queensbridge in Southbank on a sunny day, take a photo and look at it in shock. β I canβt believe this is where I live.β
When around every corner is a gorgeous old building that makes me stop and stare.
When I try a new restaurant, and discover an alleyway beside it that looks like a rainbow exploded all over it.
When my family and friends visit and I get to show them my favourite places.
When I make new friends that I would never have met if Iβd stayed at home.
Moving to a new city is one of the most wonderful and exciting choices I have ever made.
I love it here. Like all long term relationships, itβs not always butterflies and goo-goo eyes. Moving to a new city takes work. Becoming a local takes even more work. Setting up a new life somewhere else takes effort, patience and endurance.
It takes commitment to the long haul. And that is something I need to work on. Long term commitments are not my strong suit, and I need to work on that. Melbourne reminds me of this nearly every day.
I love the thrill of the move and the knowledge that with enough patience and effort, Iβll reap the rewards of a long term relationship with a new city. The intimate knowledge that only a local can know.
Iβm still excited to travel regularly, because it will always be an important part of my life. Iβm still excited to move to other cities one day β I want to live in New York, London, Paris and a few other cities which Iβm purposefully leaving as wildcards. Iβll come back to Brisbane one day too. But I can’t live a life of travel and living in difference cities, if I can’t learn to commit to one place for a while.
Now the hard work begins, so the real fun can start.
Update: I lived in Melbourne for four years after writing this post, and absolutely loved my time living in there. You can read more about what I got up to in Melbourne & surrounds here. I’ve moved away for now, but I will definitely be back.
Have you moved to a new city? What did it teach you?
Hello! I’m an Australian travel blogger, living in Melbourne, Australia. I grew up in Brisbane, studied in Paris, lived & worked in New York City and now live in Melbourne, Australia.
I love sharing specific and useful recommendations, itineraries and guides for the most beautiful things to see, do, experience & eat wherever I go.
My favourite travel destinations are Australia, New York City & surrounds, France, Greece & Japan, but I’m always excited to explore somewhere new!
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I agree with you here. I just moved to Bangkok and getting settled in is harder than I thought, harder than traveling. I am pretty sure I really offended the clerk at the grocery store yesterday and now I have to see her mostly everyday! I had to buy toilet paper today – that was a first overseas. Yes, this is different for sure.
Sounds like a steep learning curve! I was lucky I was at least still in my native country, but you’re right, travelling is much easier than moving!
I’m moving soon and I hope that NYC will offer me so positive moments! In my opinion it is up to you how your new city will accept you! Just go outside, breathe deeply and start living your new life! Greetings!
I totally agree Zara! Good luck, and enjoy! π
Hi! I’m new to your blog, and I love it. π I loved reading this post from the perspective of someone who just moved to a new city. My bf and I have been traveling for month, staying for 2 weeks to a month in each city. It’s just the right amount of time because then we can take it easy and still have enough time to see all the sights! But I’m also really looking forward to when we decide to settle down somewhere for a while. I imagine that the newness and thrill will wear off, but it’ll be nice to have somewhere to call home too and fill up a home with cozy things too! I hope you continue to enjoy Melbourne!
Hi Anna! Thanks so much π That sounds like the perfect way to travel, you get the best of both worlds! Thanks, I’m loving it more and more every day π
I think you’ve summed it all up pretty perfectly! I couldn’t relate more. Although the honeymoon phase of moving somewhere new fades away pretty quickly, it’s still possible to find little adventures every day. I don’t think anything will ever beat the thrill of traveling somewhere new, but settling into a new city to call home can be incredibly satisfying too π
Thanks Courtney! I hope to have lots of new experiences both moving and travelling, in the future, fingers crossed π
Totally agree with you here. Moving is very, very different from travelling, even if you move to a place you’ve loved to travel π I travelled around Ireland for ages before finally actually moving here, and it’s a completely different experience. <3
Thanks Sarah! Hope you’re enjoying the move to Ireland – glad to hear I’m not the only one who thinks so!