It’s sort of like being asked the dreaded “How was school?”. But unlike your day spent behind a desk, there’s at least one interesting, exciting or terrifying story you could share about your trip. But “How was it?” encourages a typical response, such as “It was amazing!” or “So nice to get away.”

Yes, how was India? How was spending two months in New York City? How was Paris, Italy, Greece and Turkey?

Great?

Good?

Amazing?

It’s totally normal to ask “How was it?” when your friend gets back from overseas, but I think there are at least 10 better questions to ask a traveller that will make for a more interesting conversation for everybody.

It’s often asked with good intentions, and of course, a lot of the time people are just making polite small talk. But if you really want to hear about the most interesting, exciting, terrifying or beautiful thing that someone else experienced on their travels, ask something specific. You’ll probably learn something interesting and the person you’re asking will be able to relive something meaningful from their travels.

Who knows – it might even inspire your next trip, or at the very least you’ll know a little more about the world than you did before.

10 better questions to ask a traveller

1. Which was your favourite place you visited?
2. What surprised you the most about how people live there?
3. Were you able to pick up some of the local language?
4. What was your favourite neighbourhood?
5. Was the country/city like you expected it to be?
6. Did the places you visited remind you of anywhere else?
7. What was the most memorable meal of the trip?
8. What was the highlight of your trip?
9. Would you re-visit anywhere you went? Will you go back to see other parts of the country?
10. Would you ever consider moving there?

1. Which was your favourite place you visited?

This question gets straight to the heart of it. Generally, people will gush about everywhere they visited, but asking for the favourite destination of the trip will often lead to some interesting stories or insights. You might learn more about the person you’re talking to, but also something interesting about a foreign destination that gives you a great reason to go yourself. For example, when I spent two weeks in Greece recently, I absolutely loved every island we visited in the Cyclades, but if I had to choose a favourite, I’d probably choose Paros. It’s a tough call, but I thought Paros was the best all-rounder in terms of charming, white-washed traditional Cycladic villages, beaches and ease of getting around the island.

Read more: Paros Travel Guide

2. What surprised you the most about the way people live there? How was it different to home?

This can make for a really interesting conversation, because it’s super specific and it makes people think carefully about the things they saw. Whenever I travel to another country, what surprises me the most is often the simple everyday things which I never considered doing differently. For example, when I was in Tokyo for a week, I loved how serene the streets were despite the crowds – even Shibuya Crossing was calm and peaceful, even though it’s the busiest intersection in the world! I also noticed that many major streets had gentle music playing, through speakers dotted along the street. I’ve never seen that anywhere else!

Read more: One Week in Tokyo

3. How long did it take to pick up some of the language? Did you have any major lost-in-translation moments?

This is a great question for hearing more about how your friends interacted with locals, and is likely to be the source of some of the funniest or most heart-warming stories of their trip!

Funnily enough, despite being a native English speaker, Americans had a lot of trouble understanding my Australian accent and vocabulary when I first started travelling in America. I was surprised to learn that Australians are comfortable using Australian-English, British-English and American-English words, and that while we’d understand 2-3 different words used for the same thing, in America, most of the time they only recognise the American-English word. Like the time I asked somewhere where the “rubbish bin” was, holding some rubbish (in a food court!) and the long, confused conversation that continued until I tried “trash can.”

4. What was your favourite neighbourhood?

If your friend visited a major city, asking about the coolest neighbourhoods they found is a great way to get ideas for your own future trips as well as hear about the city behind the tourist traps. For example, some of my favourite neighbourhoods in New York City are Nolita, West Village and NoHo, which are close together but offer very different experiences of the city.

5. Was the country or city like you had expected it to be?

I love this question, because it really helps people bust some myths about different travel destinations. So many times, a city has been nothing like what I’ve expected, for better or worse. I liked Los Angeles so much more than I expected to, and loved discovering a small part of the city’s craftsman culture through Warner Brothers Studios and the Griffith Observatory. On the flipside, Chicago was actually quite different to what I expected – I expected a smaller New York, and while the skyscrapers are beautiful, the local culture, history and atmosphere on the streets makes it a totally different place altogether.

6. Did the places you visited remind you of anywhere else that you’ve been?

This one can be really surprising. For example, I was so surprised that the rugged coastline of California’s Pacific Coast Highway & Big Sur reminded me a lot of the dramatic cliffs along Australia’s Great Ocean Road, in Victoria.

7. What was the most memorable meal of the trip? Did you try anything very unusual?

I love talking about different food cultures & cuisines around the world, even if I wasn’t there to try it myself. Some of my favourite food experiences have been in Jewish delis & knish shops in New York, trying Cuban-American food in Little Havana in Miami and pretty much everything I ate in Tokyo!

8. What was the highlight of your trip?

It sounds vague, but picking on highlight experience really makes you think! People travel for experiences, and many people travel to tick off “bucket list” items. Asking someone what their favourite moment or experience was the highlight of the trip is a great way to get people excited to tell you a story about their trip, especially if they’ve been travelling specifically for a once-in-a-lifetime experience!

9. Would you like to re-visit any of those places, or explore other parts of the country?

A return trip is high praise. Most of us have limited time & money, so when someone is prepared to return to the same places, or visit new places in the same country, it means the destination has really swept them off their feet. If they’ve just got back from somewhere they’ve absolutely loved, they’ve probably already got some ideas for a return trip one day, and you might get some great ideas of other destinations in the country that aren’t as commonly talked about. For example, I loved my first trip to Greece, when I visited Athens, Mykonos and Santorini, but on my second trip I wanted to see more of the Cyclades, especially parts that were less over-crowded. Paros, Sifnos and Milos were the perfect follow up!

10. Would you ever move to any of those cities?

A move is the ultimate compliment. Could your friend see themselves actually living there every day, or is it somewhere they’d rather just visit and then return home? Usually, when someone is so ga-ga for a place they want to live there, they’ll have some really compelling reasons – which can lead to some great insight into the heart and soul of a place, and what makes it magic.

What are other good questions to ask a traveller? What do you love to ask, or be asked?